הכרויות סקס חינם|הכרויות אינטימיות

I'm a 40F, and I took a dating break for a year, after a messy breakup beforehand (he gave mixed signals, then ghosted me). Now I'm just remaining open, but not on the apps, and I wonder, how do I decenter dating, and center myself? I've heard the drill before: center your career, hobbies, interests outside of dating, self-care, ofc, but how to put this into practice, especially if someone walks into your life who seems interested/friendly/cute?

While I was single by choice and negated dating, I dove head first into my career goals, work, and some hobbies (I'm in grad school currently). But recently a guy has come my way, possibly even flirted a bit, and I'm like thinking about him a little more than I should. Not obsessively, because I'm still focused on my goals, but more than I'd like.

I don't want to completely get rid of the possibility of dating someone, but I don't want to think about him really either and instead think way more about myself. How does this work for you all (particularly women)?